Tuesday, November 28, 2006
::whateva-tomy::
The doctors did the wadeva-tomy today that opens up the respiratory today. This procedue basically creates a small hole below the throat area to allow him to breathe through there. The doctors said he will last longer like this. We are hoping to spend as much time with him as long as he's fighting hard.Cherish whatever you have now, but not forgetting to let go when the time comes
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Johnson: Dun act stupid -.-. sm is a person la lol. Yeah, it is supposed to be for immediate family. But there are some really close friends that really want to talk to him, to encourage him, so its kinda hard to stop them. I know that forbidden entry to all is no good to him BUT entry to all is ALSO No good to him. Oh well -.-".
sm: yeah and most of them are girls haha. If u wan to play dota you must try to dig out ur bro's wc3 cd and install it.
8:50 PM
Monday, November 27, 2006
::Ba Ba Black SHeep::
Haven't blog for some time. Proabably my whole life revolves around:Morning: Sleep > CO practice > take MRT
Afternoon: Hosptial pei my kor.
Night: A bit of entertainment like games den SLEEP.
So it is rather boring and tiring I admit.
And he is not getting any better...he's got other complications such as pneumonia..
We tried VERY HARD to limit his massive pool of classmates (sec) + poly classmates + workmates + Bike friends + friends + gf? + more gfs???? from entering to prevent further infections.
Bleh
Might as well go hospital to be the "host" for his friends (sarcasm included)
Got more den enuff to worry about le.
Since I am online now i might as well do something constructive like mapling dotaing
right? (> points towards someone who is doing something stupid like habbo-ing :x)
Tag replies:
Johnson: Bah DUN GET THE WRONG IDEA
Sm: omg so LAME. need to use abbreviations until like this meh? lol.
8:32 PM
Friday, November 24, 2006
::cont'd 9::
Nothing much to post today. His heart rate has stabilised and so is his breathing. But so far his only reflex is only breathing...I wonder if that is a good or bad thing.Today we brought his mp3 player as well as a portable speaker and played music at his bedside. Hopefully he can hear the music.
Went to loyang "Da Buo Gong" to pray for him. Many of his friends had said he is a good person that helps people...so, we hope that he will "jia you" and get well.
8:58 PM
Thursday, November 23, 2006
::cont'd 8::
""You Are a Fighter""Another CO practice today. Mr Lee was like very enthu today and even force us to go for a break. We suspect that he want to be free to go see the auditions for entering NJ CO. (and perhaps jeer and laugh at the poor chap that is about to be auditioned).
I was quite shock when I reached my brother's bed. He was breathing very hard and his heart rate was also very fast. My sis explained to me that the doctors had removed the respirator and he is now depending on himself to breathe. It was really an agony sitting there, watching him struggle to breathe, heartrate going up and down all the time. We are constantly telling him to relax but he is such a strong fighter. Perhaps he is actually trying very hard to be with my family. By evening, though, his condition has more or less stabilised and he is able to breathe on himself more calmly rather than depending on the respirator. I supposed that is the only good sign I have seen so far. "Kor, we r so proud of you!"
Johnson: yup up to you lo. yea i saw edmund advertising around about his proposed chalet...4 day 3 night -.-" I will die there la. so loooong.
9:21 PM
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
::cont'd 7::
^Thank You Jonathan, Johnson and Tian Hao For visiting^I really appreciate it very much...though I hope you dun come here just to look at big fishes haha. And jonathon (if you saw this), remember the promise you have made ^^.
Went back to school for CO practice, as usual got reprimanded again and again. I must really find time to look at my scores and memorise the notes.
Later went to the hospital. My parents have eventually decided to allow the doctors to change the pipe of the respirator rather than removing them. His body is getting weaker everyday, and its only time before he depart for another world. There is nothing that the doctors can do anymore other den sustaining his life and hoping a miralce can happen.
Sorry if my previous posts made it such that I sounded really upset and "about to break-down" condition. Im okay, my family have more or less accepted the fact that my brother isn't gonna be around anymore. I am just trying to accompany him as much as possible and talk to him. We believe that while his body is long "dead", his spirit still resides in him. I promised to him that me and my sister will take care of our parents, and hopefully, he will have no more worries.
Tag replies:
Hong chuan: Oh, I didn't know that. Of course i dun mind. Sure I welcome you to see him...if you want to know more details pls call me at 81185880. (my hp)
Shurong: My memory isn't that bad -.-" I will be fine...thanks for ur concern..
8:37 PM
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
::cont'd 6::
Condition unchanged. We will be hearing the doctor's recommendation before making our decision tmr. Whatever will be, it will be for the interest of him.Tag Replies:
Yuklun: Yup sometimes logic defies what I thinks from my heart...I will make my decision with my heart. Thanks for your advice and concern.
Siling: Yea my family is accompanying him all the way...and before I forget let me wish you happy birthday in advance...
11:05 PM
Monday, November 20, 2006
::cont'd 5::
Its not a question of losing hope, or its not a matter giving up on him. Fact is, he is already tried his best. If he is not young, he would have be gone a few days ago. Its not only his head...but its also his spine...even if he do wakes up (extremely extremely small %), he would be paralysed and worst still, a state where all he could is to live...and can't do anything. Its really sad, but we have to make a choice, as we discussed with the doctors today. One option would be to prolonged his life by opening up a hole in his throat so as to allow him to breathe without the respirator. Another would be to remove the respirator...and let him go naturally... But we feel that my brother were be more hearten if some of his organs were to be donated as he always used to go donate blood. So thats all....we are still considering....its a very harsh and hard decision to make. Im sure he would leave with no regrets...as he had always wanted to enjoy the thrills of riding a bike...and he has done just that....all I wished is that he would hear me calling him "kor..".Live with no regrets...sounds easy but hard to do......
Tag replies:
Johnson: yea...we will be observing him this few days....we will have faith. You too must take care hor.
Hong Chuan: the hosptial is actually quite far...at changi general hospital located near simei. It would be quite inconvienent.... And thanks, I appreciate your concern very much...
Zee: yup i will......its just hard to accept the reality.
10:36 PM
Sunday, November 19, 2006
::cont'd 4::
Not much progress with his condition today.Went west point mall with my father, which was 5 minutes away from hospital. We rarely get a chance to be together and shopping, thus its good that this time I am able to accompany him. Its refreshing to be out of the routine sleeping > go hospital for the whole day > went back home to sleep.
The doctors is conducting a few tests tomorrow to see if his brain is dead...the signs aren't optimistic, but we will see.
have faith
Tag Replies:
To yamone, suyin, hong chuan, siling - thanks for your concern...yes i will spend more time with him...and I sure hope the gods will be willing to give him a chance...afterall he was about to go to a temple when he met the accident. Oh yea hong chuan I obviously still remember you.
9:42 PM
Saturday, November 18, 2006
::cont'd 3::
I had regretted many things - why I never told my brother I cared about him..Hell, I was like treating him as though as he was not around. But he has never blamed me...he even sometimes came to talk to me...I remembered he tried to help quite a few times, even commenting about my choice of Chaos Knight in DOTA. Now I really doubt I had the chance to talk to him about it now..His lungs got infected...he had now to breathe with the help of a machine. He still doesn't have much progress in his head...the chances of him passing through the ordeal are closer to zero den ever. Hopefully a miracle will occur.
Haiz really tired now...
Tag replies:
Johnson: To be honest I'm a bit confused with two johnsons lol. Never mind if you cannot find time to visit...I'm okay..
Sm: Yea I will be. Afterall life will have to go on...its just the feeling of heart-broken and regret. Be good to your brother!
9:25 PM
Friday, November 17, 2006
::cont'd 2::
20%....thats what the doctor said about his chances for recovering and be awake...the doctors dun seem to be too optimistic. If he cannot wakes up...well...i wun say anymore...Turns out my brother was turning around a bend with his motorcycle when a taxi at the end of the bend suddenly U-turn....he dun have time to react...at all. He crashed to the back of the taxi, and his motocycle landed 20m in front of the taxi...that alone showed the force of the collision...
I'm fine...me and my parents were already prepared for the worst...though I am very worried about my parents, who almost were shedding tears all day.
Tag replies:
Johnson: I dun think you should come....cuz the hospital is changi general hospital...quite far..I will be fine...I appreciate your concern very much....messages on the handphone will do...
Sm: I rather wished he would fight over with me over the computer now.
10:27 PM
Thursday, November 16, 2006
::Cont'd::
Just came back from hospital after staying for the whole day...I have never remembered being in the hospital for so long. Every moment we feared the doctors might come out from the ICU doors and say my bro is in worser conditions. Luckily today the doctors din say much, except the brain damage has been stabilised. What we and my parents were worried about is the probability of him waking up...the damage was just too great. However, the doctors say he is still young and probably had more of a fighting chance..so we will keep our fingers cross...pls pray for him.10:50 PM
::ACCident::
I probably wouldn't be tagging for quite a while. My brother has met up with an serious accident on wed...and his life is in danger. I would'nt be elaborating on the details here now, cause I have no time...me and my family will be in the hospital waiting to see whether he can pass the danger state.. I do not seek pity or encouragement...afterall, this is my blog and it will be not good towards the memory of my brother if i dun post this...5:03 AM
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
::To Be Childish or Not to Be::
Whenever I see my ex-classmates jonathan and kester bitching and fighting over the tiniest things, the first thing that came to my mind was that they are being childish. So "old" already still act like a kid. But then jonathan said:"If you dun be childish now, you won't get a chance to be in the future once you start working and be an adult. You will be termed as "idiot and crazy person", not just childish!"
Haha. Make sense huh? So everyone lets be childish and scream around and jump like kids!!! LOL. Okay maybe not to that kind of extent.
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So far the holidays have been fairly routine. The only thing I see I can do in the holidays is (1) Go Gym (2) Go LAN (3) Go school for CO (4) Stay at home and ROT....oops sorry its BLOG. Its unlikely I can be an OGL. Tommy had also asked me whether I want to go india for self-initiated CIP. But the drawbacks are that the trip will cost a lot!! (thousand plus) and mainly its spent on the air ticket. And its fairly uncertain whether I can get a part-time job since I asked for it so late. Oh well, I guess there are other things to do if I cannot go for all the above-mentioned activites....I can always go for NJ's supposedly favourite hobby - mugging! Haha. This is what SoMeone is doing huh?
9:27 PM
Sunday, November 12, 2006
::Long Day::
If only life can forever be like this....This morning went to gym at NINE THIRTY AM. Thanks to johnson lim, who asked for that kind of ungodly hour. I was still so groggily until i reached the threadmill machine! The others were late, as usual. Oh well did supposedly 1.5km in 7.5 mins..though i highly doubt the accuracy of that machine...I can't improved that much in such a short time -.-". As usual played around with a few other machines that trains the shoulder, back and front. So tired liao.
Then later we swim in the omg hot and bright sun. Today is such a perfect day for sun-tanning! Me and shee kwang just laid on the pool and bake ourselves until we turned red and decide to call it a day. Sk kinda regret it as he swim until his face becomes very very red...even after a few hours. Hope dun get sun-burned...otherwise might get "whiter"!
Had cup noodles for lunch. Yup im that poor. Went to IMM to buy johnson's protein powder. Seriously, the can of protein powder is quite heavy and it costs NINTY BUCKS ($91)! Johnson is kinda desperate to gain weight huh...I personally feel that just eat more normally den can le lor...need to go to this extent meh.
After that we took the 45 min interval shuttle bus back to clementi and sk wans us to go queensway shopping centre to find his shoe! Already so tired le..den reached queensway, joined by qixian...to find for the same shoe but in different shops. Went to many many different shops to check whether which shop sells the shoe at the cheapest price....but qixian in the end nvr buy anything! kinda zzz..reached home at 5pm...yawn so tired now....
I tink its time to look for a new layout....any1 has any suggestions?
10:06 PM
Saturday, November 11, 2006
::Pokemon or Digimon?::
100----------------0-------------------100 (Level)Digimon--------Doraemon---------Pokemon
This metre is used to describe girls. Obviously the more right side the better lol. (If you are a boy) what level of pokemon/digimon are you looking for?
**Hint hint - If you are still wondering what I am talking about, I will say that people like selina (from SHE) is a very high lvl pokemon haha.
Okay today went vivo city in the afternoon. Before you groans and look away from the millionth "vivo" post, my post will be rather different. I will just state what I want after walking from erm 1 hour (my legs cannot stand shopping!)
- I want to eat carl's jr!!!
- I wan buy adidas jacket!! (eight bucks -.-")
- A new shirt from a shop called "pool and bear"
- The ezone at vivo SUCKS!
The place was so cramped that each person had approximately 45cm x 45cm of moving space. Besides there is also a gay green man that is like "hard gay" and keep on dancing around and coaxing people to go shopping! lols. People should never go vivo during weekends...its so crowded la...too bad I nvr take picture.
Haiz wondering should I go to work part-time..as a waiter in holland village (one of the restaurants there)..my parents had relunctantly allow me to do so...but sometimes i wonder whether im cut out for it.
7:41 PM
Friday, November 10, 2006
::WANG ZI - PRINCE!::
Today I had CO practice from 3.30pm to 7pm. Before practice I saw the council people play some sort of captain's ball, but with a catch - the "ball" is a ball of cabbage -.-" I supposed that will be one of the games during orientation next year.As usual the practice ended so late that when we reach the sidegate, it was closed. Cursing, me and the other girls from the cello bass section (Kai hui, kahyan, mei chen) went all the way up back to nj and go through the main gate.
Anyway we were halfway down the slope when Kai hui from behind suddenly screamed. Like some dominos, kahyan and meichen also started screaming. All meichen said was:
"WANG ZI!" (prince)
I looked up and saw only trees and the dark sky
I looked in front and saw nothing
I looked down and saw only fallen leaves...nothing at all...until I notice a small sized-figurine staring up at me.
At the moment I feel like singing 'Little Froggy sing a song'
I maintained my composture and just walked past the little frog/toad wadeva
Meichen practically ran past it
The other follow suit
I was about to say "lets go its just a little frog"
When I noticed there were many more down the pathway
I then decided to walk down the road instead of the pathway to avoid more froggys and screamings
This should teach those who want to go out of nj main gate after a heavy rain :D
8:46 PM
Thursday, November 09, 2006
:: THINGS TO DO::
I thought about it, and I think its only appropriate for me to write the "Things to DO" section in this blog. So....::THINGS TO DO BY DEC 31::
1) Gain weight (>65kg) and adhere to a strict gym training daily - all for passing NAFA
2) All the holiday assignments : Maths (Hwa chiong & RJ paper) Chemistry (Prepare for organic chem - alcohol test) Biology (Report on Gene Therapy) Econs (cannot remember...)
3) Make sure I become good friend with my double bass and know how to play the SYF piece by end of holidays
4) Revise all the 4 H2 subjects to ensure I am ready for A levels
5) Buy a new Mp3 player (my old one has retired)
6) Complete Final Fantasy 12
7) Train hard for DDR and trash SM (Muahahahaha :p)
8) This list will be updated when I can think of it
8:57 PM
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
::PW IS OVER::
Lets do some numbers shall we?11 months of researching, agony
5 group members (Me, Faisal, Julie, Zhi Hui, Deniece)
5 major documents (PI, EOM, I&R, GPP, WR) making up
83 paged GPF (Group Project File)
1 powerpoint presentation
NJ 069
PW IS FINALLY OVER!
Today is my group's oral presentation. Before that I have to prepare documents such as I&R as well as a read-able, understand-able, audi-able speech, therefore I do not have much time for blogging. HOWEVER PW IS FINALLY OVER! So therefore I can blog, and with much more effort than usual.
I stapled my computer-printed speech to the cue card, and
Faisal said I was cheating :P
Julie said the words is so small -.-" (Cannot understand why..she got serious myopia la).
Anyway, by doing that, I am more confident of what should I say and during the practice, my group said there was huge an improvement. I am so happy! Lols.
Had to oversee two audience duty before my group's OP presentation. I was perhaps awed at the other groups' presenation. One even give us "cocktail tea" to drink. It was made up of honey, vitagen, and traditional chinese tea. The taste was.....maybe at best okay la...but I think I will stick to the "health-detrimental" pokka lemon tea!
During my group's OP in the afternoon, the audience were like super bored at our presentation. One guy even have the nerve to yawn and so eslewhere when Faisal was presenting! SO PLS TO ALL FUTURE AUDIENCES, PLEASE TRY TO LOOK INTERESTED AS IF YOU ARE NOT, IT WILL BE VERY DISCOURAGING TO THE SPEAKER. Luckily its better during my presentation, maybe due my comical appearance or whatever "korean" accent I had, the audience actually looked a bit more interested. I moved my eyes all around the room as I was presenting and quite a few pairs of eyes were looking and smiling at me (which I am super thankful for!). Thus I did manage my speech well.
The Q & A section was the most interesting part. Before the OP, we found out some "loopholes" in our presentation as we were practicing. We orginally wanted to fix it, but due to time constraints, we were unable to do so. Anyway someone in the group came up with the brillant idea of "predicting the examiner's question by giving them something to come up with an question about". We predicted quite a few, like the in-depth reason of our choice of age-group and what was the unique point of our roadshow and our website (MY IDEA..muahahaha...okay okay that was overkill -.-"). My question was to answer why not "STUPID" athletes. This question was expected (we discussed about it like half an hour ago) as we have decided to put down that sentence in Julie's speech but did not explain why. In the end, all the expected questions came up~! LOL. So this should teach you something about what you should do to handle Q & A :p
DUN OVER- RELY ON IT THOUGH>>IF THE QN DUN COME UP and THE EXAMINER PENALIES YOU ON THE LACK OF DETAILS, ITS NOT MY FAULT. MY CASE WAS REALLY ACCIDENTAL.
3:57 PM
Saturday, November 04, 2006
::
Blogging from edmund's house...my first time use of mozzila firefox! Honestly I see no big difference from it and microsoft internet explorer. Why mozzila? hmm.5:46 PM
Friday, November 03, 2006
::Chinese A levels::
Today was chinese paper and admittedly, it was easier than expected. All the promos from other schools gave extremely "cheen" words in the second comprehension. This time round, the words given were more familiar to me. Composition was a bit crap. Im basically writing and convincing that managing time is very very important, but then me myself do not practice that -.-" So the content may be a bit of a give-away. Haiz. But then overall I tink I should have done better than in promos. So fingers-cross....chinese B! or if i am lucky: A!Had a trial OP presentation today. Mr chee was like using his handphone to sms or something when ME was presenting. Wtf? I deliberately change my tone a bit to emphasis something to make him look at me, but he keep on switching his attention to his stupid phone. Okay, Im being a bit bias here. But seriously it was irritating. And somemore I had to compete with the rain and say my speech as loud as I could. I got high ME (meeting expectations) for all the various sections, but then maybe I cannot use it to gauge my presentation as he may not be listening at all -.-" So zzzzz right?
8:32 PM
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
::PW::
People, please do help me feed my pet tiggy once in a while whenever you visit! Lol!I practiced my speech today in front of zee and faisal. It was....horrible-terrible plus vegetable. Seriously. I only wrote point forms in the cue card (if I write an whole big paragraph then its kinda no point to use a cue card to start with), and I cannot remember exactly what to say! Some comments were:
1) Stop fidgeting ur shirt!!!
2) Stop bouncing up and down! It will make ur speech unclear -.-"
3) Please practice in front of a mirror! (I tried - but looks quite stupid)
4) Memorise and practice like crazy!
5) RELAX!
Okay looks like my speech is cmi la. Its not that I don't dare to speak, but maybe I am too nervous, such that even though I can say the words out, the sentences were so disjointed that nobody understands wth I am talking about. Haiz.
practice practice and practice.
Do I stand a chance? I definitely hope so...